~ TAYLOR ANTONIO MOSCATO ~

          

This memorial website has been created in memory of our much loved baby boy Taylor who was born at the Baulkham Hills Private Hospital in Sydney, Australia on Monday July 25, 2005.  Taylor's little heart stopped beating and he was born sleeping.  We try to think that he is now an angel in Heaven and a very bright shining star that shines down on us always.  

We will never forget the times we spent planning all of the things we were going to do together.  The day that Taylor came into our lives was the happiest and the saddest time of our lives.   He was taken from us too soon and we will never understand why.  

We will go on loving him, remembering him and he will forever be in our hearts & thoughts.  

Taylor's resting place is in the Garden of Innocence at the Castlebrook Cemetery in Kellyville.   He is not alone! Footrot our faithful companion of 16 years is with him and we know that they will be having a great time in Heaven together.   We look forward to the day that we can all be together again.

Rest in peace little man knowing that you are loved by so many, especially and always by your Mum & Dad.

I didn't have to look into your eyes
To fall in love with you.
I didn't have to hear your cry
To know you loved me too.
I didn't need to hold your hand
To cherish you for always.
Within my womb, we shared our hearts,
You touched my soul,
You gave me memories
I'll always hold dear.
Yes, my heart aches
Since you departed too soon.
But a mother's love does not end with death.
For you are my child, 
Forever my love is yours......


And so I hold your tiny hand in mine
For the hardest thing I've ever had to face
Heaven calls for you
Before it calls for me
When you get there save me a place
A place where I can share your smile
And I can hold you for more than just awhile
A million times we'll miss you,
a million times we'll cry.
If loving could have saved you,
you never would have died.
In life we love you dearly,
In death we love you too.
In our hearts there is an empty place,
no one could fill but you.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
but you never went alone.
for part of us went with you,
when God took you home.
His garden must be pretty,
he only wants the best.
He put his loving arms around you
and said: "My child, come home to rest"

~ The Day You Went Away ~

It was in the middle of the night
And I woke up with a terrible fright

I was 24 weeks pregnant with my 1st son
And I knew that this wasn’t going to be fun

We grabbed our hospital bag just in case
And rushed to maternity in great haste

I could feel your wriggles and kicks
And thought you were just playing tricks

The nurses checked for the sound of your heart
And I laid very still as they brought in another cart

It was then that the fear started to set in
And your Dad looked on without a grin

The doctor confirmed the nurse’s fears
And your Dad & I were left in tears

Your little heart had stopped for no reason
And we were left to a long grieving season

We miss you each and every day
If only we could find a way

I have Taylor's special teddy bear which is very precious to me.
I cuddle him when I'm lonely and thinking of my little boy. 
He's so easy to talk to and I tell him everything I am feeling 
and also all the things I miss so much not having Taylor with me. 
I dream of Taylor being snuggled up with his teddy in Heaven. 

"What we have deeply loved we can never lose,
for all we love deeply, becomes...a part of us"


- - - OUR JOURNEY - - -
In February this year (2005) I fell pregnant with assistance from IVF Australia and of course my great husband. Taylor was conceived and man! were we excited. At 5 weeks I was out washing dogs (I'm a mobile dog groomer) and I felt an awful feeling you know where and had to rush home to see what the heck had happened. I had no pain but was bleeding terribly and of course was really worried so I took myself down to the hospital where I spent 6 hrs waiting for someone/anyone to come and see me. When the Doctor on duty finally arrived he said that the blood tests showed that everything was alright and that I was still pregnant but suggested I come back the next day to get an u/s to check the baby's heart beat. He also said that if I was going to miscarry there was nothing he could do about that - "if your going to miscarry your going to miscarry" were his exact words (comforting I know!!). You can imagine how this made us feel at this early stage in our pregnancy & our first baby ever, along with the fact that it was an IVF baby and not to mention my age ('old' I keep getting told - 40 ). Anyway the next day the ob/gyn did an u/s and we could see the heart beating and a funny little thing that they called our baby. No one could explain the bleeding but it continued up until week 11 and then eased off to just brownish discharge every now and then. We had an u/s at Wk 5, 7, 9, 12, 16, 19, 21 when we were told and could see that everything was really going well. My placenta was low lying (placenta praevia) and started to cause some blood clotting and at week 21 I woke up at midnight to find blood everywhere and when I went to the toilet a clot the size of a cricket ball came out - far out!! straight to the hospital thinking the worse but we saw our boy and there was a heart beat - I spent 3 days in hospital and was then told to go about my normal duties and expect to be in and out of hospital for the remainder of my pregnancy due to the placenta laying over the cervix. 2wks later we had another u/s and all was good - phew!! We were told then that I may need to have a CS at 28 weeks and to have my hospital bags packed and the nursery ready - it was all tooooo exciting and man were we ever so ready for our little bundle of joy. After 21 years of wanting a child, 2 divorces, endometriosis & not to mention a fibroid (I had the fibroid shaved off in Nov ’04 before we started IVF) I WAS HAVIN A BABY BOY and his name would be ~Taylor~. At 23wks another blood clot in the middle of the night so back to hospital but we weren't worried as we knew this was going to happen. However, this time the midwife could not find a heart beat and was worried enough to call in our ob/gyn. I said to her “here he is see” as my stomach moved up and down but the midwife was quick to tell me that they were Braxton Hicks contractions and not Taylor. 2 hours later our ob/gyno arrived with his special computer monitor and after 10mins he gave us the worst possible news ever "sorry Cheryl there is no heart beat, Taylor has passed away". WHY?!?!? HOW?!?!?! Far out!!!! We were in disbelief and just wanted them to try another machine as we were sure it was fauly. So we went off for an u/s to see where the placenta was and it have moved enough for me to give birth naturally. On this u/s it was very clear that Taylor had passed away. So at 11.15am & again at 5.15pm on the 25th July I was induced and gave birth to my beautiful perfect baby boy ~Taylor~ at 8.39pm that same day – he was so sweet as he slept so peacefully. Tony was there with me the whole time – he just wouldn’t leave my side and I couldn’t have done it without him. My Mum was great, she let me squeeze her finger when the injections got too much for me and was so helpful with arranging the funeral and letting close friends & family know what had happened – their grandson, nephew, cousin and our son had gone to be with God. I was rushed into theatre to have a part of the placenta removed that didn't come out properly & when I got back to my room I got to hold my little boy again. What a day - what a week & now months. We left the hospital with empty arms which was just not the way things were suppose to be. I came home to a beautiful nursery all ready for Taylor which was absolutely heart breaking. We had Taylor cremated on the 28th July and now his ashes rest in the Garden of Innocence at Castlebrook Cemetery, Kellyville. He has a little girlfriend on one side whose name is Jazmine and a little mate on the other side whose name is Max. I visit him daily and are grateful that there is a quite place for just Taylor & I to spend time together chatting. It’s amazing how much closer I feel to Taylor as the days go bye and I understand now that he will always be a part of me and will always live in my heart. What the future holds I do not know but I do know that Taylor will always be in my thoughts and will take up a very big part of my heart that can never be filled. 
Rest in peace baby angel ~Taylor~.

We believe you have blessed us with baby Sarah....your sister!!